Super duper ladies

Movie Review: Catwoman (2004)

I'll give Halle Berry credit for accepting her razzie award for 'Catwoman' in person. She really took it in stride. This movie was just plain awful. The only slightly interesting thing about the whole movie is Berry's Catwoman outfit, a sexy little leather suit that shows off more than it covers. Berry plays a meek advertising company artist who is unwittingly drawn into a criminal conspiracy. One dark and stormy night she is supposed to have a meeting with her boss at some shady looking factory on the outskirts of town. Her boss doesn't show up so she decides to go looking for and begins openning every door she can find despite the multitude of signs saying 'do not enter' or 'danger' or whatever. Seems reasonable doesn't it? She just happens to stumble onto a murder in progress and is left for dead by the villain. By the way, the villain is a woman with tough skin (caused by toxic makeup) played by Sharon Stone. Yep, tough skin, that's her super power. Anyways, Berry dies but is somehow brought back to life by a bunch of stray cats milling around and presumably peeing all over her. She now has the power of a cat, which seems to include super strength, agility, the power to scale walls and fight like Bruce Lee. Because all cats are great fighters aren't they? The director, someone named Pitof, adds a lot of funk and R&B music which really does nothing for the film. A colossal failure across the board. 2/10

Movie Review: Elektra (2005)I'm not all that familiar with the character of Elektra. All I know is that she is an assassin and used to appear in Daredevil comics. She also appeared briefly in the horrible 'Daredevil' movie. What made anyone think she deserved a movie of her own I'll never know. Jennifer Garner plays the cool killer here. She is completely wooden and emotionless, perhaps that is the way the character is supposed to be but I didn't give two shakes of a stick about what happened to her. She has a young sidekick played by Kirsten Prout, who despite being from my hometown of Vancouver, was just awful. Annoying, annoying, annoying. I guess she got the role because the actress practices Tae Kwon Do in real life. There is also an old mentor figure played by Terence Stamp called Stick, a blind martial arts teacher. I didn't buy his character for a second. They battle a bunch of super baddies with various weird powers. When they die they mysteriously turn into dust so I'm not sure what they are supposed to be. It was funny to see former K-1 fighter Bob Sapp as the evil strongman. He gets taken out by a falling tree which he didn't see. It's a little strange because he is the one who knocked down the tree in the first place. This movie falls flat on it's face because of it's poor story. With all the great unproduced screenplays floating around out there it's sad to see junk like this getting made. 4/10

TV Review: The Tick - Animated (1994)

Finally, a good review. Based on an independent comic book by Ben Edlund, this series is about the adventures of a nigh indestructible, nigh mentally incompetent super hero called the Tick and his regular Joe Sixpack sidekick, Arthur. They battle outrageous villains such as Chairface Chippendale, who has a chair for his head, and Dinosaur Neil, a simple paleontologist who is transformed into a rampaging dinosaur. This is one of the best super hero spoofs out there.